What is happiness? I am struck by how seldom we talk about happiness anymore. The media always has a lot to say about national moods of anger and anxiety, and banner headlines routinely tell us that people are fed up, frustrated, and “fit to be tied”, to use one of my grandmother’s phrases. But when was the last time you read or heard anything positive about happiness?
On the rare occasion that people try to analyze happiness, it usually is defined as something dependent on a few fundamentals: 1) Have your basic needs covered (food, shelter, health and safety). 2) Get enough sleep. 3) Be in relationships that matter to you. 4) Show compassion to others and yourself. 5) Have work or interests that engage you. [Summary from Amy Bloom,NY Times Book Review, Jan. 31, 2010] But once you have given yourself a grade on this checklist, do you feel happy? Or do you end up feeling worse, beating yourself up for not having engaging hobbies, coupled with lousy sleep habits?
One secret of happiness is that it is “other-focused.” Being happy does not result from self-inventories, but rather from being aware of things outside ourselves that make our lives meaningful and put a lilt in our step. This is more than just counting your blessings; it is being able to remember and give thanks for the way that your body and spirit are fed through times of beauty, words of good humor, and opportunities to serve and be served by others. This issue of Reaching Out, with its emphasis on mission, hopefully will spark some interest in deeds that encourage an “attitude for gratitude.”
As one who routinely gets a song stuck in his head, I think that another helpful resource is to have a “happiness mantra”–a word or phrase that we remember when times are tough and which gives us a dose of encouragement. This mantra should be something more than the autosuggestion that “everyday in every day I am getting better and better.” It needs to be more than Norman Vincent Peale’s power of positive thinking; more than Disney’s “Whistle While You Work” or Bobby McFerrin’s “Don’t Worry, Be Happy.”
My recommendation for a phrase that can elicit happiness and inner peace is the opening line from the Westminster Shorter Catechism, which says that the chief end of humanity is to glorify God and to enjoy God forever. Our primary role in life is other-focused, or more specifically, God-directed. Our words, deeds, thoughts and prayers are for glorifying God. But equally as important is that we enjoy God forever–to literally be graced by God with joy and happiness. This is not something we do; rather it is something God does through us and for us. The knowledge of God’s love (revealed in Jesus Christ) and the experience of the Holy Spirit’s providential presence in our daily life leads us to states of joy. It frees us, encourages us, and thereby brings us happiness. This month add that phrase to your “happiness checklist” and see what a difference it can make!